For the second time in as many weeks

I've been brought to tears looking out my front window.

Bam-Bam has been struggling, a lot, by not having anyone to play with here at home. It's been a long time since Songbird and the boys were here but lately its been blaringly evident that Bam-Bam is without someone to share time and toys with.

For me it's just another reminder of my infertility.

The situations that brought on the tear-jerking were similar. Two little girls, under, say, 10 years of age, walking down the road toward home. Bam-Bam was outside, the first time playing alone and today playing catch with daddy, and he asked them to join him on his new groovy swingset.

Both times the girls kept going on home.

Both times my boy stood, stoic, in the middle of the yard waiting for their return.

My heart just aches at the scene.

I promised him that I'd ask the parents at the bus stop for some phone numbers so that we can make some calls for visits on days like today. Days when his "only-childness" screams unfair. When neither TallBoy or the dogs are enough. When his toys lose their luster. When all he wants is someone to chat with, laugh with, share with.

I'm gonna get those phone numbers tomorrow. For him. And for my broken heart.